Two more TOP TEN LISTS

Friday,January 18

OK, as I am packing, it is time for my next two top ten lists. The “Top ten things I will miss about China” and the “Top Ten things I will NOT miss about China.” So, with apologies to David Letterman ...

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Top Ten Things I Will Miss about China
10. Looking at a beautiful woman every five feet (or less).
9. Wearing shorts, tee shirt and sandals all year round.
8 Buying DVD’s one week after the movie is released, and paying only one dollar.
7. Looking at someone and using the “I don’t understand” excuse before walking away.
6. Missing my bus and knowing the next one is only two minutes away.
5. Women on the street saying HELLO, and NOT wanting me to go on “a date”
4. Going out with 20 dollars in my pocket ... eat, drink, treat a few friends to lunch, buy some groceries, play pool ... and coming home with money left over.
3. Rone, Jennifer, Linda, and the rest of the great people here, including: Alison, Tina, Winnie, Selice, Fiona, Cissy, Zoe, Rita, Tracy, Sophie, Julia, Jessie, Sarah, Yvonne, and some boys whose names I forget.
2. Rone, Jennifer, Linda. These three have been so amazing, they get on the list twice.

And the number one thing I will miss about China ...

1. Not worrying about where the nearest Chinese restaurant is.

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Top Ten Things I Will NOT Miss about China
10. Looking at a beautiful woman every five feet (or less). A man’s libido can only take so much.
9. Making a multiple choice test question with choices A and B (True or False) , and getting three people who selected C.
8. Obscene phone calls in Chinese. Can’t get aroused if I can’t understand them.
7. Ordering a hamburger, and asking “Where’s the Beef?”
6. People that think talking Chinese louder will help me understand them.
5. Low water pressure and being restricted to five minute showers.
4. Carrying my own napkins to a restaurant.
3. Beer with only 3% alcohol.
2. Squatters ... and hoping the first time I had to use one will also turn out to be the last.

And the number one thing I will NOT miss about China ...

1. Hitting my head on doorways.

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